Archive for May, 2007

An Impossible Night

Thursday, May 31st, 2007

AN IMPOSSIBLE NIGHT

copyright May 29, 2007, by emmy

It was an impossible night. Heaviest rain Althea had ever seen. The canyon road was obliterated by the torrential downpour enveloping the car as she snaked her way down to the town below. It was so bad that the wipers had almost no chance against the beating water.

“Damn” Althea spat under her breath, “I can’t be late for this, I just can’t” She pressed her toe down on the accelerator as far as she dared. It was her 25th birthday and Tom had been hinting at having the surprise of her life planned for her. She loved his simple loving nature.

Tom would be early, he always was. Althea knew his ways and really tried to be on time, early even but more often than not something delayed her nearly every time she had to meet him.

Tom had proposed to Althea three months ago. A beautiful diamond gleamed up at her as she gripped the wheel. Tom planned this dinner four weeks ago, choosing the restaurant, menu and wine with great care. He made the reservations to get the perfect table just to the left of the large fireplace at the inn. Althea knew how important this was to him. “Damn.”

It was impossible to see the pick up diagonally stopped in the road. Althea slammed on the breaks and swerved right to avoid hitting the truck but skidded to a stop hitting the guard rail on the right side of the road. Because she was trying not to crush her beautiful black silk dress Althea did not have her seat belt fastened. When the car hit the rail she was thrown into the windshield and steering wheel.

Slumped over in the front seat Althea slowly lost consciousness. “It seems so dark and hazy” here she thought. Getting out of the car she said aloud, “Where exactly am I.” Nothing looked familiar. “That’s odd; the rain has stopped so suddenly.” Also she had been traveling the canyon road all her life and “that house was definitely never there before. Better call for help.”

It was a cottage really with a beautiful front garden and white gate shining in the misty moonlight. The gate squeaked as she made her way to the front door. Night blooming flowers perfumed the air. She pounded lightly with the gleaming brass door knocker. A shuffle from within told her someone was coming to the door.

Althea gasped when the door swung aside and Tom’s wide grin greeted her. “Hi honey happy birthday.” He took her hand and led her inside where a warm fire was crackling in the fireplace.

He had soft music playing and a light supper laid out on a side table. Althea could still smell the scent of the garden wafting in through the open window, curtains shifting softly in the night air.

Tom sat her on the large comfy sofa and offered her some fruit from the table of food. It tasted sweet and wonderful. Althea started to apologize for being late but he stopped her in mid sentence. “We can discuss that at another time, this is really about your birthday you know.” He offered her some more food and settled back with her to eat. In addition to the fruit there were cheeses and crackers, cold chicken and small toast points.

The food and the warm fire lulled Althea into a dreamy state so when Tom suggested she go upstairs to the bedroom she complied willingly. Tom followed her closely as she ascended the winding staircase. She could hear him breathing behind her. A shiver went down her body in anticipation of the lovemaking she knew was to follow.

The entire hectic day seemed to catch up with her as she stood in the center of the cozy bedroom. Tom undressed her allowing her black dress and slip to fall to the floor at her feet. Next the black lace bra and panties along with the black stockings and garter belt. He picked her up and carried her to the bed, it felt so soft. She could hear Tom removing his shirt and shoes. The sound of him unbuckling his belt always caused a quickening in her groin. She shivered as he drew it from the loops around his waist, placed it, doubled over, on the night table and removed his jeans.

As he sat on the edge of the bed he motioned for her to come to him. Althea rolled herself to him and winding her arms about his neck and torso accepted his deep loving kiss with pleasure. Without a word he pulled her over his knee. Even though Tom had spanked her many times before Althea hesitated causing him to pull her with a heavier hand landing her with force face down over his lap.

“Don’t worry Baby” he cooed “it’s just your birthday spanking. You will get 25 of my best with one for good measure.” His strong hand kneaded and caressed her backside as he talked. As his legs trapped hers so she couldn’t shift away he drew her free hand into the small of her back holding it with his left hand.

Whack, “One” he said. Harder than she remembered. Whack, “Two” Harder still. Whack, Whack, Whack. Three four and five came in hard rapid succession. Not what she expected but the agreement was that Tom was completely in charge of her spankings. He paused after 10 to slip his hand down between her legs sliding his fingers into her slippery wetness.

The next five brought a tear to her eye, then Tom stood her on her feet and led her to the end of the bed and laying down a pillow pushed her down over the foot board. Tom spread her legs so that her toes barely touched the floor. She waited in docile anticipation for the next stroke of his hand. Then she heard it.

 

The clink of the buckle on his belt. It would be the first time Tom had spanked her with anything but his hand. Althea shivered as she gripped the soft quilt with both fists.

This first stroke was the most painful thing Althea ever felt at the hand of her beloved. It spread out over her already sore bottom like wild fire. “Sixteen” Tom reminded. She gasped with horror now remembering how many more were coming to her.

At 23 she felt her body succumbing to the throws of orgasm. It was difficult but she held out taking the last three strokes before letting herself go with it. He took her from behind enjoying the heat of her recently warmed bottom and pulsating orgasm. His hard strong shaft fully entering her again and again bringing on a second orgasm as he pushes into her as far as he can at his moment of release.

It seems like hours before they are able to move again. He picks her up and lays her on the bed, “Happy Birthday darling.” He whispers to her as he tucks her in. “Sleep” she mumbles as he slides into bed behind her, feeling his strong arms surround her she drifts away.

“Must be morning already” as what seemed the like the ringing of her alarm clock changed to a siren like yowl. The bed was moving. Tom was talking to her but she couldn’t make out his words that sounded tinny and then faded away again.

“Daylight, whiteness, can’t move” were her first thoughts. “The cottage and Tom where is Tom.” Althea felt the beginnings of panic grip her as she came to in very unfamiliar surroundings. “Well good morning girl” A cheerful red faced woman in a pink smock scurried in with a vase of flowers. “Welcome back. I’ll get your nurse, and maybe that handsome fella that’s been hanging around here underfoot all night.”

Althea was told of her accident on the canyon road the night before. “You’re lucky to be alive young woman.” The doctor told her at mid morning. “Concussion, light bruising two cracked ribs, you can go home tomorrow providing you do what you are told today” the doctor warned before he left. But where was Tom Althea wondered. She could not for the life of her remember her accident but the Cottage and her birthday spanking were clear as day.

It was 12:30 when Tom strode in. He had gone home to shower and change out of his suit that was ruined from the rain. He looked stern but relieved that she was ok. He placed a loving kiss on her forehead and large manila envelope on the bed beside her. “What’s this” she said picking up the envelope and turning it over.

Tom said, “Open it”. Inside was a beautifully drawn picture and brochure. Althea turned white. “That’s it,” she gasped, “The cottage.” What are you talking about Al? That’s your birthday present. I signed the papers last week. It’s our new home.”

Althea told Tom about what happened the night before at that very cottage and how she had no recollection of the accident. Tom assured her there was no birthday spanking delivered by him last night anywhere and definitely not at their new cottage, however, when she got well she could expect him to remedy that situation. He also let her know that she was to expect a harsher, more severe spanking over her bad habits of being always late and speeding around in the car without her seatbelt buckled around her. Tom was angry with her for endangering her life, but for now relieved and content to put it aside temporarily.

The nurse came in to get her out of bed for the first time. Tom watched as she put her feet on the floor. With the nurse on one side and Tom on the other she took her first shaky steps. As the nurse steps back behind her to tie her hospital gown she remarks. “We can’t figure how your bottom got so bruised in the accident dear. Not a usual spot to bruise for a concussion you know.” Althea looks back at the mirror behind her to see her still well reddened backside sporting slightly bluish welts.

Hope you had a great birthday Patty. Many happy returns.

Just another birthday

Wednesday, May 30th, 2007

copyright May 28, 2007, by Taz (aka Jeff, aka Sir Bump) 
Driving home had always seemed aggravating,but today just seemed a little more stressful than usual. First off,no one could have had any way of knowing that today was her birthday and she knew this, but even in the abscence of knowledge a little civility would be a nice thing.Maybe Steve would be the bright spot in her day and they could do something.

Steve opened the door for her with a smile as broad as the same door he had opened for her in exaggerated gentlemanly fashion.
“Happy Birthday baby!Come on in, Ive got the shower ready for you and our dinner reservations are set.”

 In spite of the past few moments of irritation she couldnt supress her own smile. Good ole’ Steve.  Her rock and her very reason for living.  He never let her down.Never cut her off in traffic….  Never sat motionless when the stop light was green,,,green as grass,,,as green as it GETS!

She forced herself to stop her in brain rant and bantered back and forth with Steve about how making a fuss wasnt necessary,and that it was just another of many birthdays.His nodded understanding conveyed a smile that made it plain that he knew his wife and he also knew that she would say these things.  But doesnt everyone like their birthday acknowledged?What she didnt see in his smile was the certainty that her birthday was soon to be acknowledged very clearly.

Stripping quickly and hopping into the shower,she felt the stress draining away as quickly as the water from her hair.She stood for long doses and let the water run through her hair.  It was less of a soap and water shower than one long rinse cycle.  She laughed at that thought and reached down to snap the water off.The sound of the shower curtain being slid back out of the way of her exit was loud in the silent aftermath.

She almost shrieked from the start of seeing Steve leaning with his back to the doorjam.  For a brief instant she thought of griping at him for scaring her like that.  She was unable to do so after she saw the belt in his hand,draped over one shoulder.

Her mind ran through a variety of dodges,smoke screens and pleadings.The one she settled on sounded just a tad bit too hopeful to pass muster.

“Before we go!!??”,she bleated.”Shouldnt we wait until after dinner?!!?” her stomach felt full of butterflies in an instant.  She thought maybe the butterflies were on vacation and had been replaced by a pack of vultures.

‘NOPE!” he shouted in a voice that contained just a little too much glee for her tastes at the moment. “Youre gonna be sitting on a sore ass at dinner tonight.  When we come back Ill be taking care of the leftovers.Both the food and whats left to spank out of you.But first things first!”

She opened her mouth to protest.  He silenced it before the word even formed with his index finger held to his lips.  Then with the same index finger turned towards the floor spinning in tiny circles he smiled and nodded his head.  His meaning was known well by this stage in their marriage.

Obediently, but with a slight shake in her knees, she turned her naked body for him to offer up her behind.  She bent forward, and with hope still springing eternal, put her hands on her knees and waited.  Hearing his chuckle, she inhaled sharply and exhaled through her nose while bending down further to wrap her fingers in between her toes, like she knew he was about to demand.There was one last card she could play.  Sounding tearful was her last line of defense so she thought she might as well go for it.

“Its my BIRTHDAY,Steven!”

The smile broke over his face like a tropical wave on a warm island. “Yes it is,my love.  YES it is!”

The pout lasted only as long as it took for the sound of the first crack from the belt to fill the room.  Her expression changed from pout, to panic, to very sorry wife in a few precious seconds to his eyes.

“Ohhhhh Noooo! Oh no, Oh no, Oh no,” she chanted while she gathered her breath and waited on the next fireball to find her bared and offered bum.  She wasnt kept waiting long.

“Can we now dispense with the grumpy grumbles about getting old, about birthdays, being unworthy of celebrating, and in general how unhappy you are with life, your financial situation. 

At this point she was grateful that her fingers were wrapped in between the toes and underneath the balls of her feet. Simply touching them would have led to a break in position and by the time they reached her age she would have had quite enough, thank you.  The added whacks for breaking position would have been a nightmare.His words were a reminder that the explosions going off on the surface of her bare bum were ones that she planed the charges for all week long.With the detonator in his hand, it was best just to keep her mouth shut,despite the urge to protest. The only sound to escape her lips were yelps and pitiful sobs until he told her she could stand up.

When he grabbed her up and hugged her tight she was silent and peaceful. She listened to the sound of her hitching breaths slow down and her husband cooing quietly to her that he loved her, and that this particular spanking was over.
“This….particular…spanking….?” she stuttered.  Her eyes were the classical deer in the headlights.  This was only the first round.

His smile was classically evil.  “You remember telling me about a month ago that your fantasy for your birthday was
that I would spank you like a naughty slave and make you do everything in bed that I want?  Well, I’m gonna give you your fantasy baby!”

She laughed genuinely for the first time all week long. “Cant you take a joke!?” she grumbled in mock-seriousness.

As long as she lived,she never forgot the glint in his eyes at that moment.  Neither one of them were really getting old.  He pushed the bathroom door open further so she could see the dress he had laid out for her.  Lifting her chin,he changed the tone of his voice so she would know that at least about this much,he wasnt joking.

“No underwear.Dinner is at 7:00 pm.You dont want to be the reason we are late.”

She lowered her eyes,because she knew how much it turned him on and simply said, “Yes Sir.”

He strode purposefully to the bedroom door.When he reached it he turned with a beautiful smile and said, “Its not gonna be just another birthday baby.”

When the door closed she brushed the tear from her eye and set about getting dressed.

Birthday Replica…

Tuesday, May 29th, 2007

by maggie May 28, 2007

I was stirred from my dreams by the dreadful screams of the alarm clock, and my morning began. I reached for the snooze button, and I realized that Tim was no longer in our bed. I made my way downstairs to the kitchen, but he wasn’t there either. “Where could you be this early on a Sunday morning?” I spoke into the empty room. It was then that I heard the garage door open with the roar of his truck making its way through the open garage door. A few minutes later Tim appeared. He stood there before me with a smile on his face and a bouquet of roses in one hand with a gift in the other. I just smiled. After I put the roses in the vase, he led me to our bedroom. We were curled up under the sheets when I asked about opening the gift that he brought with us upstairs. Tim simply smiled and said that I could open it now or after my birthday spanking. Of coarse I should have known by the smirk on his face that it was a trap. But I was too excited to see what was inside. I took the package and ripped all the paper off, and I tore into the box. The look on my face caused him to chuckle. It was a replica of the hairbrush that I threw away a few months ago… Um, I mean the hairbrush that mysteriously disappeared. He simply said that since I opened the present before my birthday spanking, that he would have to use the contents to perform the act. Before I knew it, I was over his knees with my nighty pulled up to my shoulders and my panties on the floor. After 25 solid whaps and an extra for good luck, he threw the brush down and we made love for the rest of the morning. It was a great start to a special day.

 

 

here’s # 1, thank you maggie, hope you like the drawing … looks like Jeff’s got one up too…. ;)   Hope some more folks join in…. 

Readers Write; Starter

Monday, May 28th, 2007

A Birthday to Remember

(A fantasy, by patty)  copyright 2007

Patty brought the groceries in through the back door and then went quickly to work putting them away.  Bagels in the fridge, peanut butter in the cupboard and all the rest of the produce in the sink – it was her habit to wash rinse and spin dry the fruits and greens before putting them in the crisper.  John came quietly up behind her as she place the last of the ruby reds and tangerines into the fruit bin.  He cupped her raised vulnerable bottom, one cheek in each firm hand – his fingers spread so his little fingers met at and teased the deep narrow cleft between her cheeks.

“Happy birthday,” he whispered into the right side of her neck as Patty stood to relax into his inviting invitation.

“Hmmmm?”  She nodded and turned into his embrace.  “May I give you my gift, or do you have other things to do that won’t keep?”“I think I’m all caught up.  We can eat for a few days anyway,” she kissed him again and relaxed completely into his embrace her torso molding to his as though she was plasticine being shaped by the strokes of his hands and arms on her back.

“Go on into the bedroom then.  You’ll know what to do.  I’ll join you in just a few minutes.”  John’s gentle push moved Patty away from the fridge so the door could close and gave her momentum toward the family room.  The room was dark save two candles that flanked a large bouquet of dark red roses, made the sensual velvety color of newly spilled blood by the dim flicker of candle light.   The subdued scent of jasmine from the candles made the rich luxury of the perfect roses heady and served to wake up anticipation.  In front of the flowers, a long white box rested perfectly on a strip of flawless though very old sepia Irish lace.  “Open me now!” Was written on a manually hearts and kisses embellished card – a card reminiscent of an Alice in wonderland moment - the command written in a pen that might have come from the mad hatter himself.Patty smiled.  She loved the surprises, and though this one was beginning like nothing she’d lived before even though there’d been hints that they’d share sensuality and spanking had come up for a while.  She was very much appreciating how she was being simultaneously melted and made to feel the peel away of all her day time armor; and enticed with a growing trust into every thing John had planned.

*******

He’s asked her what she wanted for her birthday, and she’d answered that a few nice spankings during the day might be nice.  A small bouquet of flowers sent to work, mostly for vanity, always felt sweet, but most of all, since he’d asked and really wanted to know, she kissed him and spooned with him, pulling his hands around her so she could cup both to her lip.  She kissed them both and then using her lips, tongue and fingers, traced the long lines on his palms making memories of each sinew; Patty answered frankly; “John, I want the spanking of your most secret dreams.  I trust you to tell me when you sense the time is right  Trust me,” she’d whispered again, the last time her answer drifted away,submerged under the seductive waves of oncoming sleep.

*****

 Patty picked up the box, and the lid came away easily.  A flowing black satin and lace teddy spilled out over her hands.  Held up to her torso, she knew instantly that it didn’t just fit her, but it would give her the sensual freedom of movement she craved from t shirts.  Below the tissue Patty didn’t discover a card.  Instead there was a 12 inch school master strap.  ½ inch wide 12 inches long and ¾ inch plus thick.  An OTK brand of a strap that she’d hoped John would never discover.  Her hands trembled a little.  Putting the gifts down, she turned to follow the candle light and the path of rose pedals into the bed room.  The bedroom smelled clean; especially fresh.  All the weekly comforters and day to day sheets & cases were gone and new stuff they got at Christmas completely decked out the room.  Silken 800 thread count chocolate brown sheets covered the feather bead & mattress and most of their down pillows.  Even Patty’s long full body pillow was covered.  The gold, burgundy, sage and peach jacquard & damask of the heavier Euro-shams, the ruffle & the comforter had been laid out in a frame.  4 white elements occupied the bed, a foam reinforced down filled core pillow for Patty’s head; a gorgeous cut Asian lily it’s pristine white petal swirl hiding the deepening fragrant blood red of it’s deeper core was placed right where her right hand would find it when her torso would find comfort as her bottom was finally placed up over the larger stack of pillows..  The smaller top two down pillows that topped the rich looking dark stack in the middle of the bed were framed.Patty stepped back.  The masculinity of the room she once feared would smother, was going to be a perfect fit for her.  Orchids, lilies, while silk and linen all belonged and fit perfectly.  It had taken John’s hand to bring it out.

“You did all this?” she whispered, when she felt more than know John’s presence behind her.

“Like it?” he smiled.

Patty simply nodded.  John’s belt and Patty’s older blog strap flanked the blanket table that was also adorned with candles.  This bouquet was larger, but Patty had to smile.  Two bulbous blooms white and pink tinged hydrangea clusters had been arranged with greenery and baby’s breath to look just like a very spankable bum.  The part that made Patty laugh, but her giggle changed to awe when she saw that most of the back drop of what 1st seemed more like an up turned skirt, actually looked much different.  Careful examination of the gorgeous overlapping shining and carefully molded Calla Lily’s that formed the side and rear frame of the bouquet looked for the entire world like a macabre upright vampire’s collar.  The red and candle light made the blush on the hibiscus look almost like maybe there might have been some warm up already.

Another long box was there to be opened on the blanket box before the bouquet.

Long silk black stockings, silk bikini panties and a lacey garter fell away from the tissue that surrounded it.  Below them the lifted tissie revealed the long thin London Tanner strap Patty’d bought for John.  Each of the garments were sexy though Patty succumbed to transient wonder about fit (especially around her inner thighs.  It would be moot.  The camisole was already perfect.  John would have his framed bottom, just as he had his framed tableau.  Something about the framed female bottom appealed to him, and so it had become special for her to try to offer for him.

There was more yet.  In the bathroom the whirlpool tub was full to over flowing with the fragrant scented bubbles of gardenias, sandalwood and Valeria, and Patty’s favorite loofa brush and sponges were set in the basket.  More candle flickered on the vanities, the back splash behind the tub and on the tile risers that separated the vanities from the tub.

John kissed her threatening tears away, and helped Patty disrobe so that she could descend into the perfect heat of the tub.  He knelt beside her lathering one of the many available wash cloths and began with her face, kissing the sweet lather and then rinsing it before moving to her neck, then her back arms and legs.  A lot of dripping from the wash cloths and some splashing conspired to soak John.

“Join me now please? Patty whispered before he was able to direct his ministrations to her chest.  He smiled.  There was room enough, he was wet enough, and the evening was young.  Patty watched his gentle eyes while he deliberated, and smiled when they twinkled and he tugged away his t-shirt and stood to step out of his jeans.  In the tub with her, he leaned forward to kiss her as he lathered his palms and then used then to massage bath gel from her neck down, lingering to massage her breasts, taking great care to gently pull and stretch each nipple, twisting and working the soothing lather into each pucker.  Patty slipped closer to him making it more comfortable for John to shift his position in front of her.  Their flexed legs intertwined on either side of each other, it was much easier for John to take his wash cloth and rinse away the lather his palms soothe on Patty’s torso; and then much easier for his gel laden fingers to probe and lather those private hidden parts between her thights.

“uMMMM!” Patty pressed into his fingers aiding his access to every fold and crevice.  Taking a clean washcloth, she began her own ministrations of her partner, propelled involuntarily by the glorious build up of tension his silken intimate cleansing.  She rinsed and then kissed his face, whimpering now and then because his hands gave her no choice.  “Oh honey!” she literally scrubbed John’s chest.  “Stop! Stop, Stop!’ she whispered.  His ministrations were taking her too close to climax.  “Need spanking 1sst?” John teased. When her hands found his tumescent member and began to stroke it.Patty blushed, but turned and lifted her bottom out of the water putting her suds slipping flesh in perfect position.

John laughed and laid down a hard slap to one slippery cheek, then lifted himself to sit up on the edge beside her.  He’d need better leverage he decided.Patty giggled, wiggling her bottom for more.“You like that?” John laughed.

“Yes please Sir,”

“I do like that too,” Jon rinsed more warm water and suds up over Patty’s needy bottom and then gave her five sturdy sways.

Patty yelped just slightly.

“Too hard?”

“No, just right hard,” she giggled.

“Then why are you wiggling so much?”

“Because it stings so good,”

“So good huh?”  John took that as a challenge and delivered almost 20 very stinging swats.

“OK, OW!” patty wiggled more and dropped her bottom into the cooling water.  “Lot’s more to come Birthday girl,” John chuckled and stood to let both of them out of the water onto the bath mat.  ****************Dried off and made smooth and soft with lotion and power, John left Patty alone while she donned the garter, stockings, panties and chamisole.  Ready, she pushed open the door to the bedroom to find John still nude settled comfortably on the ottoman the short narrow schoolmaster strap, her blog paddle and his etched cracker barrel paddle resting on the carpet at his feet.“Birthday spanking time my love,” he smiled

Patty felt a blend of excitement and trepidation.  She certainly needed a spanking, she’d never argue that, but with those implements?  Still, she reminded herself that she’d asked for the spanking of his fantasies for her gift.  So far there was hardly a romantic petal out of place.  She owed him the complete trust he’d hoped for in making these plans.

“Come here Patty,” John instructed her to come stand beside him where he sat on the uhpolstered foot stool.  “Pull those pretty panties down and bend yourself down over my knees.”  Obediently Patty tugged her new black silk panties down to mid thigh and placed herself prone across John’s thighs.  His hands and fingers stroked the parts of her vulnerable flesh that was framed inside the black garments.  “Hate to mark this pretty sight, but that’s not what you need is it?” John chuckled.  “You could leave it white if you like it better that way you know?” Patty teased.“Now for that I think we should start with business, a toy that means buisiness don’t you?” he chuckled.

“Oh no that’s ok!” Patty struggled just a bit until John lightly tapped her with the thin strap.  “Count these please miss Patricia.”

The next lick stung a little more, “One sir.”  The next stung a little more, “Two sir.” … This carried on with each lick landing with just a little more sting than the other many making patty gasp and squirm, all the way to 40, when John significantly tightened his hold on here.  “Now for the finish and the lesson for all your minor crimes of the past year,” He laid in the next 7 licks with enough burn to make patty buck and cry out.

After five to ten minutes of cuddling and quiet talk, the next 47 with the paddle were delivered almost exactly the same way with patty otk.  The last 7 didn’t carry quite the burn the strap did.  Maybe that was because by then Patty’s bottom was well warmed up and the pain to pleasure barrier had begun to blend.  All of the spanking with her blog strap was deliciously hot.  47 licks didn’t really seem like enough, especially the 7 last hard ones.  Her whimpering now had little to do with pain, but more to do with growing need.

Their embrace before John instructed Patty to remove her panties altogether and climb up on the bed was long.  That sex was going to follow this last spanking was without question.  John pressed his fingers up inside her and when they came away slick with her clean scented juices he smiled and used them to stroke his quite turgid member.

Patty took the intended position on the bed, her hips raised high over the pillows in the center, her face rested comfortably on the cool crisp white linen pillow, and she grasped the still firm lily by her right hand.  “So sweet!” she smiled, closing her eyes trying to take in and feel every sensuality – smell, taste, texture, pleasure, pain, soft, silk, wet, need, desire, anxiety, anticipation, joy, heet, cool, discomfort, cozy, comfort – her reverie was broken by the searing impact of the new untried strop London Tanner across her distracted bottom.  “Oh!” she yelped.“Hard one isn’t it?” John’s voice was soft.  “Yes,” Patty complained.“This one is for the times you’ve devalued yourself and let negativity overpower your potential.  You ready?”   Patty whimpered, but nodded.  While there firmness in his voice, John’s voice remained soft.  There was no softness in the strokes he used to apply the strop.  She held her position, griping the lily and the sheets to keep her hands out of the way.

When John reached 47 and stopped, Patty was softly crying.  “Now what was it you asked me for at the end; one harder to grow together on; one harder for luck and one more even harder so you’d remember to work the laws of attraction?”  He leaned down to take her chin in his hands and look into her eyes.  Patty grimaced and sobbed.  “Yes please,” she answered.John delivered as he’d promised.  ************Later, when all the candles were out, the tub drained and all toys put away, the couple spooned together. Patty’s bottom warmed John’s lower abdomen.  “Was it a perfect birthday honey?” he whispered kissing her cheek.  ‘Almost,” she smiled, turning to kiss him face to face.  “Only one thing more that I need.”  Her hands found him ready, and her embrace, with his eased him to where he belonged.  That first slow penetration and that followed until bliss and sleep took them both, made certain there would be nothing left undone this time.

[Jeff has his started….  Maggi, Paul, Tiggr, and MaggieDear all have ideas… Boy would it be neat to have this be one of the best ever group activities we’ve had on this blog?    How about we make June 5 the deadline for this one since I was thinking of having a June bride gets spanked actual contest where the winner gets a signed framed copy of the drawing.  I was thinking of announcing the contest June 1 and having readers vote by June 20.  This one was a spur of the moment thing… Whatcha think?]Image inspired by Spanking Couple

Birthday Spankings; Readers write offer….

Sunday, May 27th, 2007

“from the moment you were born you were into the kinky stuff.”  (copyright AGC, inc)  taken from the birthday card John sent me.  John of course, added his own commentary  (”Thank God!”)

So here’s my post….

The Birthday Spanking

I was lamenting how lilly white and spank deprived my bottom is on IM just a little while ago…

Jeff suggested that I offer a challenge to readers and invite you to share one of the birthday spankings of your fantasies, so I could vicariously enjoy the rich mids and ideas of others, and maybe get some muse.  So I will take him up on it and offer to draw an illustration for each Birthday Spanking scenario folks post to comments to this post or as links to this post from their own blogs. 

My birthday’s been quiet.  Not many people around my in person world even know it.  I got a card and gift certificate from my mother, an amazing 80 GB iPOD from John that’s inscribed “Patty I Love You God Bless John.’  And of course today I see as, I’m finally able to slow down and get into my e-mail, that there are e-cards, post comments and even a couple of bloggers who’ve taken time out to say Happy Birthday.

MaggieDear!  LOLOL.  That post was hilarious!.  Tigs & Theresa, you were both so sweet to note my birthday on your blogs.  Thank you.  You are wonderfully special friends.   Thanks to all of you who sent me birthday wishes,  John, Danielle, Maggie, MaggieDear, Fiestyemm, EmX, Tiggr, Jeff, Paul, Janet, Greenwoman and Tory, for your patience & persistence with me in this community.  To say you’ve become guideposts and lights along the path is an understatement.  Thank you also to those who send cards just because, and who are not regular posters due to shyness.  My gift back to you will be to illustrate any offering 100 words or more for an original  birthday spanking story or poem offered as a comment to this blog post or linked to this post from another blog…

Love, many thanks and best wishes to all of you.

patty

Tokens of affection for John

Sunday, May 20th, 2007

I have obtained two birthday presents for myself and they are on their way to John.

The infamous cracker barrel paddle

and the Vermont Country store bath brush.

 

Two less objects for me to pack and carry through airport security in July.  LOL.

Yup I have been having some intense spanking thoughts today and I believe I really deserve to give these gifts to myself directly into John’s hands don’t you?

edit:  10:23 PM.  Since one of John’s favorite implements is the belt/strap, I thought I’d give this one to myself via his hands also….

I sent him the longer thiner one of these London tanner strops, since thin straps sting much more than thick ones, and someday he might want to make a serious impression with it.  I chose burgundy for the color though since it’s my favorite and it’s my birthday present after all.  LOLOLOLOLOL.  I’m gonna be 47 next Sunday and I’ve been a real pain ‘in the proverbial ass’ these last few weeks, so, I probably otta “get it” …

Love ya’ll…. 

Working the Law of Attraction & the Secret.  I can have it, I deserve it, it’s already a given in my life.  (John, Love, DD, Spanking)

A Quiet Day

Sunday, May 20th, 2007

She spent a very quiet day after a long stressful and busy week.  Her man mailed her some lyrics that inspired her to consider what was to come for them in only 60 days.  Her bottom tingled, and other parts of her began to throb and become deliciously warm and wet.  Subtly she pressed her thighs together, slowly and gently rocking her pelvis with sensual anticipation.  The day was fast approaching when they would be together, when they would touch, embrace and kiss one and other.  Her mind lingered over the other things they would share together that day and the five days that would follow.

The possibility that she would again know the experience of being spanked every day for five days ignited other thoughts.  Would they feel it right for their growing, psychic, spiritual and emotional intimacy to become physical beyond spanking?  After restoring to her and sharing with her the intimacy and gift of love and spanking, would he allow her to thank him, to stroke his virility and take him inside her mouth, kiss him, lick and take his come into her mouth?  Would it feel right for them to lay together at some point during those five days, after her bottom has been thoroughly warmed and make love to each other?  Would she know the man she was growing to love inside her?  Would she once again experience that first thrust of the man she loved claiming her completely, the bliss of climax during the act of being taken and giving herself wholly to him?   Was it possible she might again know the intense treasure of climax during a long spanking administered by the man she loved and then open her thighs so that he may have his within her?   She knew in her heart that only what felt right to both of them in the moment would transpire when they spent those five days together, though it was very pleasing indeed to ponder the possibilities they’d talked about.  One thing she knew for certain was that during those five days, she would go to church with the man she loved and sit beside him on a well spanked bottom and share the intimacy of giving thanks to God for bringing him into her life.  For the moment she allowed herself the naughty pleasures of thoughts and possibilities and the luxury of a quiet prayer that no matter when it became right, that all of those possibilities and more would come to be between them in time. She spent the day working the Secret and invoking the Law of Attraction.

I’m OK I promise

Tuesday, May 15th, 2007

Thank you all for your comments & e-mails.  I admit this whole thing blind sided me.  Why one person’s activity bleeds into and becomes synonymous with others even though substantively they have nothing whatsoever to do with each other I think bewilders us all.

I don’t have any opinion or feelings about the ‘princess,’ beyond that she produced a saleable product, EVERYone who payed for it got what they paid for.   So she claimed in a ‘beerguy.com’ interview that she’s not a spanko.  LMAO.  A beerguy podcast?  If ever there was a tongue in cheek, enjoy a good joke and poke fun at diversity site, that’s it.  That the princess said things she probably wishes she hadn’t is a given.  Were there real cruelties wafted her way by other spanking models and readers of her blog & forum that she couldn’t suppress when asked questions that probed and woke them up?  Of course there were and I can assure you having been and remaining on the receiving end of a lot of it, that far to much of this crap is not just hurtful, it’s impossible to ignore.  I think she’s not in the most stable place, and probably never has been, but then I wasn’t either when I came to you.  You know, as one of the pioneers of a solo  spanking couple content site, I don’t care if her motives were economic or conceited or a combination of both.  She never once scamed a video.  Every one delivered spanking.  Not to your taste?  well hey don’t order another… she had it set up so one at a time was possible unlike MOST sites that require you to join only to find out they have no content you’re interested in.  Her presence and the popularity of this community brought other spanking models out.  This time last year there were fewer than 5, now there are more than 20 spanking model blogs.   OK so her appeal waned fast & she resorted to other possibly illegal tactics to get back & sustain income….  that’s for examination by the feds.  I’ve read her my space post.  Her partner isn’t an asset and should keep his marginally literate mouth shut, but her post resonated.  The kid IS a spanko who is in a very chaotic place.  Chaoic because she’s been under attack, and made worse by the probability that she’s marginal emotionally to begin with and using medicine/drugs to deal with chronic hurt.

Leave her alone!  Please!  Not a one of you in this community is threatened by her.  Not a ONE!  Sure it’s titillating, but what we don’t and can’t know so far exceeds the assumtions and speculation it’s cruel. 

Assume…. make and ASS of U and ME!  We don’t know, we can’t know, and filling in the blanks with our assumtions and judgements is among the most toxic things a human being can do.

Yes, I’m hurt having my admissions and disclosures belittled, held out as examples of an agenda and realities they just aren’t, and yeah finding myself attacked again.  Mostly I’m mad as hell that the twerps are still feeding like pirrhana on their own ASSumptions of my reality. 

No I’m not telling the internet at large about things I shouldn’t.  Todd (no that’s not his name and no I will never disclose his name) does attend a prestiguos college.  He earned his way in and that’s ALL you need to know.  Yes that school could be MIT, maybe it is, maybe it’s another equally prestigous school.  No comment.  I was too trusting at one point.  People used the snippets I gave to hunt me down and try to hurt me both personally and professionally.   They got a lot of things wrong.  Did that stop them?  Hell no.  So many assumptions about my reality have been published as essays and indictments of me now, that I’ve lost count.

It’s the supposition & expoundations of conjecture and opinion based on no consultation with the subject that really hurts me.

I’m a real person.  I gave very deeply intimate and personal pieces of myself and my life.  Why?  because people asked me to.  I could give them and others something tangible to reach out to.  I never had that.  I felt my way in the dark.

I know that there are literally thousands of people in my life online who have thanked me for that & some of you post here and e-mail me regularly.  I know you are much more important and valuable to me than the clusters of nasty shit disturbers. 

I’m sorry I’m not all the way to a place where positive thoughs drown out the doubts, fears and guilt.  As jJeff suggests, I’m much less paralyzed now than I was a year ago…. Actually I’m pissed and fixin to fight when the lies about me get resurected now….  That’s a good thing when you consider the whole process of letting go…   Dispair is much less productive than anger, and acceptance & resolution follows anger.  *g*  

Piss off bear of little brain.  I cared enough about you to give you contact info so you could have real insights into my truth.  You preferred to pass ASSumptions and your own cruel and just plain wrong judgements.  As Jim says f’ you.

I’m whipped tonight folks… work’s been really draining and I had to stay late after a draining day.  Tomorrow begins very early with an even more draining responsibilty & then the afternoon from 1PM on will be even worse.  If I get home before 9PM tomorrow night I’ll be lucky.  Good thing?  I just can’t devote my all my ire and hurt to internet shit.  Bad thing?  I’ve got a really neat set of pencils I really want to play with….  

Tentative comitments:  New drawing by Saturday…. the story I’ve got going from two weeks ago posted with it.  Me over being sad and pissed already in progress.

Thank you guys.  You’re the greatest!

love

patty

Just me

Monday, May 14th, 2007

I’m so sorry!  I wish I could just let it all go unaknowledged and ignored, but based on e-mails, hurt and sincere questions and yeah a few meanspirited posts on other blogs, I’m trapped.   So, here is hopefully the LAST reference to old crap ever to have to be posted here.

I happened upon a new spanking community uproar and episode of vehement indignation on Friday.  I have to say I’ve found myself feeling deeply sad again.  We’ve gone after a child who has really done nothing to us but make snotty comments made and taken completely out of context.  At first I was incensed that ‘Bear of Little Brain’ (his nic says it all- little brain bein the operative self description) dragged me into it after all I have done to pay for my sins online.  Actually I’m not going to get past that soon.  He (wintermute) has made some scathing and cruel assumptions out of ONLY my initial admission post on my old blog and been particularly voiciferous about them as though his assumptions were absolute fact for some time now.

I gave all of you my life.  After 2 years, I admitted to you it was a life I’d lost to the death of my partner.  I told you I’d used our diaries, our letters and his journal to make us living and real.  And I lied.  Fred died a decade ago.  Everything I’ve shared was true.  I took it out of time and altered time related details. I shared us as we were and tried to give people like me something to reach out to that I nver had.  I did NOT lie to or demean this community with deceit,  I just didn’t!

Did he travel away from home to help with disaster relief?   Of course he did, and I went with him evey time I could.  I went alone to Houston after Katrina, I took in a family of three for four weeks and was so snottily glad to see them gone from my home I hated myself….  so I made Fred the hero he wold have been….

Now I’m being lumped in with a child who created a website around being “The princess of spanking.”  Apparently (though I cannot download the iPod cast to hear for myself) this young lady who had been selling her spanking video sites on every on line venue (blog & pay site)  & been on Howard Stern’s late night show & radio at least twice said in this podcast that she wasn’t really a spanko and found aspects of spanking ‘foul’.  LMAO!   So?  What’s new? 

Whats different about this child and THOUSANDS of others of us? She relaxed (may have been high) and spoke her mind , and somebody seized on an opportunity and jumped on an already cruelly inappropriate bandwagon.

I’m not Katie.  I’m just me.  I’ve never tried to make money on any venu but my cafepress site using from anyone, NEVER!  That site is very restrictive about what’s saleable.

Mostly I’m very hurt by Wintermute’s (bear of little brain’) ongoing vindictive agenda agaist me even though I’ve written him, and even given him my phone # and personal contact info trying to give him what he needed to belive in me and everything he loved about me —- nothing of wihch has changed……. Sigh

 

Tagged by ~C~

Sunday, May 13th, 2007

Tagged by ~C~

Question number 1: What are three of the stupidest things you’ve done in your life?
In order:

 

Hmmm so many.  Let’s keep it light.
1. I ate a whole flat of Dare digestive cookies by myself one Sunday afternoon when I’d been left alone to my own devices.  After shortbreads, they were my favorite cookie.  By bedtime and all the next day I discovered why they were called ‘digestive’ cookies

2.  I tried on a dress with a stylishly snug bodice in a really small fitting room on a hot summer day.  It looked really nice, if just a little bust liftingly risqué, but I couldn’t get it off.  The polyester lining and the high waste tight around the middle style made it impossible to pull over my head while standing upright.  There was no room to bend properly! And it just would not fit down over my hips without ripping.  After trying desperately for several minutes to get it over my head, finding myself trapped, arms in the air and unable to lever the fabric up, reaching a very sweaty near panic, I had to bump the door, cry out for help and beg the sales clerk to help me pull it off while I bent at the waste.  Needless to say I didn’t buy it even though it was quite flattering and very pretty. 
 

3.  I left my sketchbook behind in a hotel.  It had 6 spanking drawings in various stages of completion in it.
Question number 2: At the current moment, who has the most influence on your life? After God, I have to say I do.  It’s my choices and prayers that are making profound changes in my life including bringing John into it.   Question number 3: If you were given a time machine that functioned, and you were allowed to only pick five people to dine with, who would you pick?

  1. Emeril Legasse
  2. Julia Child
  3. Wolfgang Puck
  4. Iron Chef;  Hiroyuli Sakai
  5. Iron Chef; Masaharu Morimoto

Of course they would all do the cooking too.
 

Question number 4: If you had three wishes that were not supernatural, what would they be?

Hmmm what exactly does that mean?
How about I just apply the Law of Attraction…

 

 

  1. I can have John as my partner, I deserve John as my partner, I already have John in my life, and we will live out our lives together as husband and wife who practice DD.
  2. I’m going to get spanked to my hearts content every day between July 18 and 22, and again in September.
  3. Work will continue to become fun again and both John and my finances will align to enable John and me to close the physical distance between us permanently.

Question number 5: Someone is visiting your hometown/place where you live at the moment. Name two things you regret your city not having, and two things people should avoid.

We don’t have mountains, although there are many other attractions.  We don’t have very many trees that are more than just scrub out in the wild landscape.  It makes driving in the countryside a bit monotonous sometimes.
 

Don’t hike off the trails without long pants and sturdy shoes and socks even if it’s hot.  All of the brush around here is VERY prickly and both the Eastern and Western diamondback rattlesnakes live here in abundance.  Avoid eating tacos from street vendors.

Question number 6: Name one event that has changed your life?

Changing my major from Phys- Ed to Nursing Question number 7: Is not a question. It’s a command. Tag five other people.
 

Jeff, MaggieDear, Maggie, Becca & Nancy(SNN)

International Limerick Day

Saturday, May 12th, 2007

 

A Spanking

© May 12, 2007, by patty

There once was a gal with a need

To have certain fantasies freed

Just baring her bum

Almost made her cum

She was a born spanko indeed

 

She placed herself over his lap

And asked him to give her a slap

To redden each cheek

Three times every week

He obliged with a resounding whap

 

A much needed spanking begun

Was not going to be just for fun

She’d asked for it hard

And played the brat card

She’d sit tender when he was done

 

She squirmed and she wiggled and cried

Even some begging was tried

It was what she got

Her bare bottom hot

A very firm spanking applied

 

“Take care what you wish for,” said he

“Cause I just might get it?” sniffed she

He nodded and smiled

Completely beguiled

By the woman draped over his knee

 

Her bottom now blessedly sore

Her body was craving some more

“May I thank you please Sir?”

She said with a purr

Her intentions ignited his core

 

“Of course you may thank me my dear,”

His hand roughly kneaded her rear

As she climbed up to kiss

And mount him, the bliss

Made the rightness of spanking her clear.

Thanks to all who’ve joined in and everyone else who’ve encouraged the fun…  Don’t forget to e-mail me with you choice of drawing and delivery instructions…  pattydraws@gmail.com.

 

 

Limerick Day is coming…

Thursday, May 10th, 2007

Callipygean dreams

[calee-pie-gee-an] 

copyright may 2007, by patty

Sweet callipygian dreams

Are shared by many it seems

The lure of pink cheeks

The thoughts a glimpse tweaks

They say it’s a product of genes

 

The lowering of panties a treat

And warming of bottoms so sweet

That those who partake

For pure pleasure’s sake

Find spanking bare bottoms quite neat

 Thanks to all who are joining the fun…. Saturday is International limerick day… & y’all know how I enjoy that kind of word play….  Join in… it’s fun… Check out Emmy’s offering to last night’s post.  *g* I think she’s caught the bug…

Saturday is International Limerick Day

Wednesday, May 9th, 2007

So, in honor of a perfectly neat day and novel creative activity, here’s a challenge to all readers here, and an invitation to any bloggers who care to participate.  Compose and post a spanking related limierick either here on today or the post I will make Saturday, or on your own blog sometime between now and midnight Saturday your time.  Anyone who posts a limerick here can request a signed numbered copy of any one of my posted drawings.  (If you participate please let me know which drawing you want and where you want it sent via my e-mail pattydraws@gmail.com)

 Hooray for International limerick day

Celebrate with a spanking word play… OK?

Here’s my 1st offering….. and I’ll go you one better… for every limerick posted in comments here, I’ll try to answer in comments with a limerick response too.  I’ll try and do the same in comments on any blog that joins the game (provided I know you joined in….)

Here’s a start..

 

Ahh for the love of it!
© 2007 by patty

When it’s time that the panties come downIt’s wise for a brat not to clown

For she knows if she does

He’ll spank hard ‘just because’

He might even pretend he must frown.

But let’s all be perfectly clearThe resulting effect on her rear

Might bring forth some tears

But rarely real fears

T’is something they both find quite dear

When her bottom is properly redHe’ll tuck her quite snugly in bed

Then climb in beside her

His heart deep inside her

Their appetites thoroughly fed

The steps of a good spanking dance Are rarely acts of pure chance

When both play their part

It’s a glorious art

When a brat is relieved of her pants

Thank yu all in advance if you decide to play…. on international limerick day :)

Sensual morning

Sunday, May 6th, 2007

I woke up to a thunderstorm this morning.  I’d slept with the sliding glass doors to the balcony open so I could sleep to the sounds of the surf and the sea breeze.  Somewhere in the wee hours it got warmer than I like.  Normally I’d get up close the balcony door and turn up the A/C, but the thunder in the distance made me reluctant to shut out the sounds.  I love the stillness and sound of a coming storm.  I know with all the really wild weather this spring, that’s probably an odd thing to say, but it’s true.  So I kicked off the covers, slipped out of my sleep shorts and T, and stretched out languidly turning my bottom to face the barely emerging dawn.  I thought about yesterday and all its hedonistic pleasures capped off by a long phone call I’d enjoyed with John.   I thought about the future, and got into the now.  The air became like silk on my nude flesh.  The sheets, cooled by the slightly moist breezes gave my limbs new places to cool each time I shifted.  I snoozed some more, eventually waking fully when the thunder became more regular and insistent, which was a little more than an hour and full dawn later.  My dream had been very sensual.  I had the female equivalent of a wet dream.  A little manual reinforcement renewed and prolonged what the dream began.  Cold now, I got up and pulled the balcony doors almost closed the cuddled under covers after putting the coffee maker on.The storm ended up being one puffed up by the sea breeze and the periodic low pressure set up by convection off the warm surf, not something produced by major clashes in air masses that make severe weather.  While there was a kick up in the breeze, lots of lightning and thunder, it mostly puffed up right over the island and stayed there.  In fact there were still occasional rumbles and drizzle going on when I packed up to get to an obligation around noon.  Within 10 miles of home the sun was out, and the ground bone dry.  The sea breeze storm, even though it lasted hours, affected a small 30 mile circle of the world.  I’m sure others popped up further inland later today, but not here.

I didn’t get to post again last night, because wireless internet is not what it’s advertised to be on islands two miles off shore.  Shortly after supper it tanked, and stayed tanked.  I tried accessing my accounts again after coffee this morning, but no luck.  So, I packed and wandered into the rest of my day being the designated collecting driver for two cyclists who by 2PM had completed an annual pedal to XXXXX event and all the subsequent festivities.

Can you believe I left my sketch book with 6 half started drawings in it behind in the hotel room!  I always take it with me when I travel in case I get quiet time and ambition.  Now I’m faced with whether or not I go back and ask for it back now that no doubt the pages have been perused.   

Tonight’s drawing is completely new… not the revealing photos of me in skimpies I was tempted to share… I’ll keep those private I think….  There’s a fellow who should see the in person version before the world sees photos.

A me day

Saturday, May 5th, 2007

I took a me day today and booked a room at a resort nearby that offers the full spa treatment.  While I would prefer that my partners was here with me in more than just spirit today, part of why I decided to come out here was to get in the mood to try on some of the sexy intimate wear I just invested in, and test out my brand new fuji digital camera.

First order of the morning was a nice walk on the beach, then a brisk shower and sauna. My first appointment was for a mineral jacuzzi soak and then a shiatsu massage.  Leg and bikini wax was next, then a facial and a pedicure.  So now that I’m situated in my room, I’ve tried on all my new skimpies. They sure are pretty, but the model needs an overhaul.  Eeep!  47 years, patty, that’s what I had to keep telling myself.  I just hope they please John. 

This is the view from my room..

It’s a zoom in from my bacony and today’s a bit overcast and windy, but 89 degrees F even so…..

another angle….

There are a few other pictures that I’ve taken, and I think I may post a teaser later tonight with a little creative fantasy.  Right now my room service has arrived so I will share these photos, say hiya and enjoy my house specialty red snapper.

Hope you’re all having good weekends…

ttfn

p.s. lololololol

Wednesday, May 2nd, 2007

You should see my brattiest kitty ‘Mini-toes’ officially named Cinamon.  While I wrote my post this evening I tossed my sofa throw into a bunch by my left hip and sat up to type with the lap top on the cedar chest I use for a cofee table.  At some point she climbed up into it and has made herself a nest in the throw, even pulled and tucked herself under the edges where she could.  I managed to accidentally touch an exposed foot,just now and got an annoyed “Mya.”  Then I touched another exposed part & got the same annoyed respnse.  So, I tugged all the edges around her tucking her in like she’s in a cuccoon, and scratched her bossy little bean, and now she’s purring away like the queen of the world.

OK now that I’ve written this her contented little chin is tucked snuggly on the quilt.  If I had a recorder I’s add the purr.  you imagine it OK.

 

So now ya’ll know who the real diva is in my house… LOLOLOL

Hope ya’ll have a great day tomorrow…. ;)

Yes MaggieD today was a better day *g*

Wednesday, May 2nd, 2007

Now, I don’t have permission to post this, but then neither has anything been said to prohibit me from sharing it either.  Ever since I accepted the invitation to go with John to the Police reunion concert in July, he’s been serenading me with a musical countdown of songs with the # of days remaining written into the lyrics, and I’ve been going to iTunes and buying each song so I can burn a CD of the countdown to our first official conventional dateThis morning’s song and some interesting highlighting of certain exerpts by John made me laugh one of the really good belly laughs… so I thought I’d share it with you before meandering on with the rest of my post.  We are at day 78 in the countdown, and this song contains the # 78.  But pay particular attention to the other content John has marked…. in red… LOLOLOL!

Swing Street
by Bruce Hornsby
I heard you say that tonight’s the night
You say there’s a party going on
I’m in the door like an old
78 side
And I hear ‘em out hitting on a Coleman song

My friend John with a mirror and spoon
Got a belt and a mainline scene
A couple getting off in the back room
Someone’s collecting money for the friend in need
Sounds like a good time, a ball to me
Sounds like a place I’d like to be
Theres a little crowd you’re gonna want to meet
Oh they got a thing going on swing streetNice old man in the corner booth
Making time with Jive-time Stu
S

he makes her sting ‘neath the table blue
Says she’s an actor but she’s hooking
as a sideline too
Oh sounds like a good time, a ball to me
Sounds like a place I’d like to be
Everybody rolls
when it’s time to meet
Oh they got a thing going on swing street
Got a good thing going down swing street
You say there’s nothing but bums around here
Listen to the sound of the cymbal so clear

Cutting contest on the stand
Somebody’s trying to blow you away
What makes him swing harder than you do
Oh better
hit the woodshed for ninety daysOh sounds like a good time, a ball to me
Sounds like a place I’d like to be
Theres a little crowd you’re gonna want to meet
Oh they got a thing going on swing street
Got a good thing going down swing street
Got a good thing going down swing street
Got a thing going on on swing street
Got a thing going on
Got a thing going on on swing street

I’ve still got a serious case of snotty wenchitis going on today, but I must say I feel a lot better than I did yesterday, and heaps better than the weepy wenchitis I experienced this weekend.  And you know, I can’t for the life of me figure out what precipitated either, though I can tell you I’ve had to deal with some snaffu’s at work that are so weird there’s nothing to do but laugh and ask ‘what the fuck was that about?’  Yesterday as I was wrapping up a huge last minute project at 6:55 PM I had the ER manager in my office helping me get it done and my phone rang.  My caller ID told me the call was coming from a patient room and she saw me wring my hands through my hands. “What’s wrong?” she said laughing.

“It’s a patient.  Patients’ only ever call me for one reason.  I don’t wanna tackle an irate familiy issue right now, I wanna go home!  I haven’t had lunch yet.  Should I let it go to voice mail?”

Naturally I picked up.  The ER manager doubled over laughing when I spoke to the caller with tremendous relief.  “Oh hi XXXX what are you doing calling me from a patient room?”  It was another Director who had a simple question for me who had ducked into an empty room on their way down the hall on their way out & expected to leave me a quick voice message while the thought occurred to them.  Then they wanted to know what the heck I was still doing at work and why on earth was there a hienna in my office.  We all laughed.  But really it was only funny from a punch drunk POV, ya know? 

New issues have come up today, one involving a software glitch that may have skewed our performance data for two entire quarters, and it’s really bugging me that I have simply been to inundated to have caught it before now.  Tomorrow I have to trouble shoot it further, and if my suspicionas are confirmed, I will have to communicate it to the whole division because I doubt we’re the only facility who has been affected.  Have you ever noticed on some pages in some software if you chose an item from a drop down and then scroll down using the roller on your mouse, that the choice you made in the drop down scrolls with the page & as soon as you click into the next field the scroll in the drop down stops, but now there’s a different answer there than the one you intended?  Well one of our data collection programs does this, and it has such huge query fields you have to scroll down to see the next query.  If you know to click any blank space outside the dropdown BEFORE you scroll the drop down may not scroll, but on some programs you can’t use the mouse to scroll at all you have to uses the side bar down arrow.  This is one of those programs!  So I have discovered, completely by accident that almost half (maybe more) of the numeric values entered using the drop down are higher than the real numbers intentionally entered by the abstractor.  Fortunately in this case the higher number in that particular field coupled with the appropriate NO we didn’t intervene in another field makes us look bad, (you’re supposed to intervene when patients score high on risk indicator… duh… ) so no one can accuse of of fudging to look good, (who would fudge to look bad after all?) but I just spent hours working on an action plan to correct our bad performance when it wasn’t really bad.  There were three other issues I just couldn’t explain either.  The charts said one thing, the data said another.   Why?  & I couldn’t make the leap to believe that there was any deliberate number fudging going on.  The soft ware has so many holes in it.  If I enter all the audit questions before I enter patient demographics, none of the skip logic works, yet the correct demographics get saved.  Skip logic should boot certain questions and enable others.  Since demographics is the most time consuming step, of course the abstractor clicks quickly up through the quick yes no N/A queries before manually entering cumbersome stuff like times dates, record numbers.  Well, even though he’s entering a brand new patient, and has selected a new file to do so, all the demographics times and dates from the previous patient autopopulate to the new file.  sooo… if skip logic for someone under 50 years of age is enabled but this new patient is over 50, all the over 50 queries are blanked out.  If your prior patient was admitted, but this patient was discharged you’re asked how long it took from arrival to final disposition (& assumes this was the ER admission holding time)… even after you enter the real birthday and the actual discharge disposition for this patient, none of the skip logic that should have disabled or enabled certain queries works once a single query has been populated before the demographics have been corrected. 

Now I ask you?  Why would any programer allow old data from totally different cases pre-populate & drive selections for new cases unless corrected first, expecially when there is a less than 0.01% chance the next case entry will be for the same patient?   Why wouldn’t demographically dependant skip logic not automatically enable as soon as the correct demographics was replaced even if data was entered into an unecessary field? and why wouldn’t missing data warnings be enabled if the correct demographics enable previously skipped fields before letting the abstractor file? 

Why does this bug me?  Because, hard working busy people develop intellegent strategies to make their work flow efficient.  If they aren’t even warned about which strategies may produce error, they are set up. Anytime you require a triple check to assure accuracy and it’s not possible to have a second person complete the verification you guarantee errors, because you know what -intelligent, hard working, busy people will read the same mistake as correct all three times.  They’re busy, they KNOW they did it right the first time their original thought process is still there alive and vivid in their minds….  

So, tomorrow’s gonna be another fun day.  Never in my wildest dreams when I went to nursing school did I ever dream that I was going to have to troubleshoot software glitches that call into question data integrity.  Of course I never thought I’d be writing and spearheading implementation of action plans to improve performance for whole departments and the facility I worked for either.

It’s all good.  Wanna know why?

1.  Because mostly it’s never boring and often it’s fun, but

2.  Because when it becomes overwhelming and stressful, makes me bitchy, snotty or full of self doubt. the best cure is a sound spanking, and ya’ll know I’m gonna get some of those relatively soon. 

So?  How was your day/week/month? 

 

OK one more day…..

Tuesday, May 1st, 2007

Goodness gracious but I’ve been a snotty shit tonight!  It’s a good thing I didn’t post what I thought to post.  *g*!

Twas a snotty bad girl thing I assure you…..

God willing, tomorrow will be a better day.  ;)