Kinky Poems for Fun

Cure for a Brat
by patty © 2005

The gremlins have taken my mind
Out to see what trouble they’ll find
I’m cussing at things
Like coffee cup rings
And messes my man leaves behind

Climbed out on the wrong side of bed
Now the nasties run round in my head
Slamming cupboards and doors
And stamping the floors
At every damned word that is said

He better be careful right now
Cause I’m cruising to start up a row
Those shorts on the rug
Were left there to bug
One more thing and I will have a cow

Just look at him clodding around
Like a mongrel not fit for the pound
His stuff’s in my way
And not put away
Yet nothing he wants can be found!

I’m stuck in a hands on hips mood
Even watching him chew on his food
Has got me wound tight
And itching to fight
“I’m pissed! It’s not attitude!”

“Yeah yeah whatever you say
I’m cruising for trouble today
Just shut up and go
Quit bugging me joe
I’m not in the mood for that play”

“The brush you say Mr. Man?
And what if I scoff at that plan?
I’m just in a mood
It’s NOT attitude!
If I want to slam cupboards I can!”

“I told you no spanking today
You really don’t care what I say?
You’re not taking no
Now the chair is just so
And I’m over your knee yelling “Hey!”

“Owie Ow! That’s really too hard
I’m mean it, you big tub of lard!
Let me up here right now
You recycled dog chow
You’re hurting me too much retard!”

“Oh shit! Please honey that stings!”
I was just a bit mad at some things!
Please, please not so firm
How can I not squirm?
No! No! leave my jeans up it stings!”

Pants yanked and shimmied way down
I look back and see his dark frown
It’s not going to end
Until my hind end
Can’t sit on the softest of down

Kicking and pinching won’t work
He really is not one to shirk
His arm finds the pace
For a marathon race
To chase off my mood and its smirk

In minutes the gremlins vacate
The mind that they could not placate
“It’s too hot in here”
They yelp with a cheer
And I’m left in a sorry spanked state

“Please honey, I’m all better now
I’m sorry I started a row
My mind’s in that place
Of soundly spanked grace
I’m finished with being a cow”

My husband keeps on with his chore
My tears now have flooded the floor
He’s making quite sure
To accomplish a cure
So my crankies and mood are no more

When he finally stops laying on
I’m howling the I’m sorry song
My bottom burns hot
But it sure hit the spot
Every ounce of my mood is long gone

“Yes Love, I feel calm and sane
Thank you for keeping things plain
I needed your help
And a sound bottom skelp
It was really a good kind of pain

The End

Oscar Myer Bottom

2003

My bottom has a first name
It's O-U-C-H-E
My cheeks they have a second name
It's R-E-D and hot
Oh I'd like to go back just a day
And if you ask me why I'll saaaaay
Cause my but is just too sore
And I didn't mean it anyway!!!!!

Spring Has Sprung

© 2003, patty

Spring has sprung
The willow's green
Switches swing
Brat butts are seen

Brat come here
Your panties low
Assume the position
Bottom up on show

SO smooths those
white round cheeks
Soon to be red
And striped for weeks

Swish, snick - Yeouch!
The rhytm goes
Just look at that wiggle
And the point of those toes

Well spanked brat
This fine spring day
The season's best
Assured this way

Use that swing
And lay in firm
Mercy now
Means she won't learn

Raise good welts
Those sweet red marks
For past and even
Future larks

When her bottom
Has that glow
Hot pink behind
The red stripe show

Hug her close
Then over the knee
Finished with
The hand she'll be

Stroke those stripes
And feel that heat
Smack her so
She drums her feet

Spank her firmly
Make it sting
Till she purrs
And starts to sing

You'll know when
She's had enough
Heated up
For other stuff

See those hips
That buck just so
Lifting up
Then grinds down slow

That's the sign
She's punished well
And other parts
Are in full swell

Warm and ready
For his arms
Good brat's now
Have other charms

Spanker time
Makes brat butt glow
Like rosey flowers
Her red cheeks show.